{"id":24,"date":"2019-05-08T14:15:06","date_gmt":"2019-05-08T14:15:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/?page_id=24"},"modified":"2021-03-15T19:24:36","modified_gmt":"2021-03-15T19:24:36","slug":"act-2-scene-3","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/act-2-scene-3\/","title":{"rendered":"Act 2, Scene 3"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

LEONATO\u2019S orchard.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Enter BENEDICK]\n\n\n\n

Benedick. <\/strong>Boy!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Enter Boy]\n\n\n\n

Boy.\u00a0<\/strong>Signior?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick. <\/strong>In my chamber-window lies a book: bring it hither 
to me in the orchard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Boy. <\/strong>I am here already, sir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>I know that; but I would have thee hence, and here again.\u00a0
[Exit Boy]<\/em>
I do much wonder that one man, seeing how much\u00a0
another man is a fool when he dedicates his\u00a0
behaviors to love, will, after he hath laughed at\u00a0
such shallow follies in others, become the argument\u00a0
of his own scorn by failing in love: and such a man
is Claudio. I have known when there was no music\u00a0
with him but the drum and the fife; and now had he\u00a0
rather hear the tabour and the pipe: I have known\u00a0
when he would have walked ten mile a-foot to see a\u00a0
good armour; and now will he lie ten nights awake,
carving the fashion of a new doublet. He was wont to\u00a0
speak plain and to the purpose, like an honest man\u00a0
and a soldier; and now is he turned orthography; his\u00a0
words are a very fantastical banquet, just so many\u00a0
strange dishes. May I be so converted and see with
these eyes? I cannot tell; I think not: I will not\u00a0
be sworn, but love may transform me to an oyster; but\u00a0
I’ll take my oath on it, till he have made an oyster\u00a0
of me, he shall never make me such a fool. One woman\u00a0
is fair, yet I am well; another is wise, yet I am
well; another virtuous, yet I am well; but till all\u00a0
graces be in one woman, one woman shall not come in\u00a0
my grace. Rich she shall be, that’s certain; wise,\u00a0
or I’ll none; virtuous, or I’ll never cheapen her;\u00a0
fair, or I’ll never look on her; mild, or come not
near me; noble, or not I for an angel; of good\u00a0
discourse, an excellent musician, and her hair shall\u00a0
be of what colour it please God. Ha! the prince and\u00a0
Monsieur Love! I will hide me in the arbour.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Withdraws]\n\n\n\n

[Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and LEONATO]\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>Come, shall we hear this music?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>Yea, my good lord. How still the evening is, 
As hush’d on purpose to grace harmony!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>See you where Benedick hath hid himself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>O, very well, my lord: the music ended, 
We’ll fit the kid-fox with a pennyworth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Enter BALTHASAR with Music]\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>Come, Balthasar, we’ll hear that song again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Balthasar.\u00a0<\/strong>O, good my lord, tax not so bad a voice
To slander music any more than once.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>It is the witness still of excellency 
To put a strange face on his own perfection. 
I pray thee, sing, and let me woo no more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Balthasar.\u00a0<\/strong>Because you talk of wooing, I will sing;
Since many a wooer doth commence his suit\u00a0
To her he thinks not worthy, yet he wooes,\u00a0
Yet will he swear he loves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Now, pray thee, come;\u00a0
Or, if thou wilt hold longer argument,
Do it in notes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Balthasar. <\/strong>Note this before my notes; 
There’s not a note of mine that’s worth the noting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Why, these are very crotchets that he speaks;\u00a0
Note, notes, forsooth, and nothing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Air]\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>Now, divine air! now is his soul ravished! Is it\u00a0
not strange that sheeps’ guts should hale souls out\u00a0
of men’s bodies? Well, a horn for my money, when\u00a0
all’s done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[The Song]\n\n\n\n

Balthasar.\u00a0<\/strong>Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,\u00a0
Men were deceivers ever,\u00a0
One foot in sea and one on shore,\u00a0
To one thing constant never:
Then sigh not so, but let them go,\u00a0
And be you blithe and bonny,\u00a0
Converting all your sounds of woe\u00a0
Into Hey nonny, nonny.\u00a0
Sing no more ditties, sing no moe,
Of dumps so dull and heavy;\u00a0
The fraud of men was ever so,\u00a0
Since summer first was leafy:\u00a0
Then sigh not so, &c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>By my troth, a good song.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Balthasar. <\/strong>And an ill singer, my lord.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>Ha, no, no, faith; thou singest well enough for a shift.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>An he had been a dog that should have howled thus,\u00a0
they would have hanged him: and I pray God his bad\u00a0
voice bode no mischief. I had as lief have heard the
night-raven, come what plague could have come after\u00a0
it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Yea, marry, dost thou hear, Balthasar? I pray thee,\u00a0
get us some excellent music; for to-morrow night we\u00a0
would have it at the Lady Hero’s chamber-window.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Balthasar. <\/strong>The best I can, my lord.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Do so: farewell.\u00a0
[Exit BALTHASAR]<\/em>\u00a0
Come hither, Leonato. What was it you told me of\u00a0
to-day, that your niece Beatrice was in love with
Signior Benedick?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>O, ay: stalk on. stalk on; the fowl sits. I did 
never think that lady would have loved any man.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>No, nor I neither; but most wonderful that she\u00a0
should so dote on Signior Benedick, whom she hath in
all outward behaviors seemed ever to abhor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick. <\/strong>Is’t possible? Sits the wind in that corner?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>By my troth, my lord, I cannot tell what to think\u00a0
of it but that she loves him with an enraged\u00a0
affection: it is past the infinite of thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>May be she doth but counterfeit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>Faith, like enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>O God, counterfeit! There was never counterfeit of\u00a0
passion came so near the life of passion as she\u00a0
discovers it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>Why, what effects of passion shows she?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>Bait the hook well; this fish will bite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>What effects, my lord? She will sit you, you heard 
my daughter tell you how.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>She did, indeed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>How, how, pray you? You amaze me: I would have I 
thought her spirit had been invincible against all 
assaults of affection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>I would have sworn it had, my lord; especially\u00a0
against Benedick.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick. <\/strong>I should think this a gull, but that the 
white-bearded fellow speaks it: knavery cannot, 
sure, hide himself in such reverence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>He hath ta’en the infection: hold it up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Hath she made her affection known to Benedick?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>No; and swears she never will: that’s her torment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>‘Tis true, indeed; so your daughter says: ‘Shall 
I,’ says she, ‘that have so oft encountered him 
with scorn, write to him that I love him?’<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>This says she now when she is beginning to write to
him; for she’ll be up twenty times a night, and\u00a0
there will she sit in her smock till she have writ a\u00a0
sheet of paper: my daughter tells us all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>Now you talk of a sheet of paper, I remember a\u00a0
pretty jest your daughter told us of.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>O, when she had writ it and was reading it over, she 
found Benedick and Beatrice between the sheet?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>That.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>O, she tore the letter into a thousand halfpence;\u00a0
railed at herself, that she should be so immodest
to write to one that she knew would flout her; ‘I\u00a0
measure him,’ says she, ‘by my own spirit; for I\u00a0
should flout him, if he writ to me; yea, though I\u00a0
love him, I should.’<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>Then down upon her knees she falls, weeps, sobs,
beats her heart, tears her hair, prays, curses; ‘O\u00a0
sweet Benedick! God give me patience!’<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato.\u00a0<\/strong>She doth indeed; my daughter says so: and the\u00a0
ecstasy hath so much overborne her that my daughter\u00a0
is sometime afeared she will do a desperate outrage
to herself: it is very true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>It were good that Benedick knew of it by some 
other, if she will not discover it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>To what end? He would make but a sport of it and\u00a0
torment the poor lady worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>An he should, it were an alms to hang him. She’s an 
excellent sweet lady; and, out of all suspicion, 
she is virtuous.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>And she is exceeding wise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>In every thing but in loving Benedick.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>O, my lord, wisdom and blood combating in so tender 
a body, we have ten proofs to one that blood hath 
the victory. I am sorry for her, as I have just 
cause, being her uncle and her guardian.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>I would she had bestowed this dotage on me: I would
have daffed all other respects and made her half\u00a0
myself. I pray you, tell Benedick of it, and hear\u00a0
what a’ will say.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>Were it good, think you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>Hero thinks surely she will die; for she says she
will die, if he love her not, and she will die, ere\u00a0
she make her love known, and she will die, if he woo\u00a0
her, rather than she will bate one breath of her\u00a0
accustomed crossness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>She doth well: if she should make tender of her
love, ’tis very possible he’ll scorn it; for the\u00a0
man, as you know all, hath a contemptible spirit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>He is a very proper man.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>He hath indeed a good outward happiness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio.\u00a0<\/strong>Before God! and, in my mind, very wise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro. <\/strong>He doth indeed show some sparks that are like wit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>And I take him to be valiant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>As Hector, I assure you: and in the managing of\u00a0
quarrels you may say he is wise; for either he\u00a0
avoids them with great discretion, or undertakes
them with a most Christian-like fear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>If he do fear God, a’ must necessarily keep peace: 
if he break the peace, he ought to enter into a 
quarrel with fear and trembling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>And so will he do; for the man doth fear God,
howsoever it seems not in him by some large jests\u00a0
he will make. Well I am sorry for your niece. Shall\u00a0
we go seek Benedick, and tell him of her love?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>Never tell him, my lord: let her wear it out with 
good counsel.1010<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>Nay, that’s impossible: she may wear her heart out first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Well, we will hear further of it by your daughter:\u00a0
let it cool the while. I love Benedick well; and I\u00a0
could wish he would modestly examine himself, to see\u00a0
how much he is unworthy so good a lady.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Leonato. <\/strong>My lord, will you walk? dinner is ready.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Claudio. <\/strong>If he do not dote on her upon this, I will never 
trust my expectation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don Pedro.\u00a0<\/strong>Let there be the same net spread for her; and that\u00a0
must your daughter and her gentlewomen carry. The
sport will be, when they hold one an opinion of\u00a0
another’s dotage, and no such matter: that’s the\u00a0
scene that I would see, which will be merely a\u00a0
dumb-show. Let us send her to call him in to dinner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Exeunt DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and LEONATO]\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>[Coming forward]<\/em>\u00a0This can be no trick: the\u00a0
conference was sadly borne. They have the truth of\u00a0
this from Hero. They seem to pity the lady: it\u00a0
seems her affections have their full bent. Love me!\u00a0
why, it must be requited. I hear how I am censured:
they say I will bear myself proudly, if I perceive\u00a0
the love come from her; they say too that she will\u00a0
rather die than give any sign of affection. I did\u00a0
never think to marry: I must not seem proud: happy\u00a0
are they that hear their detractions and can put
them to mending. They say the lady is fair; ’tis a\u00a0
truth, I can bear them witness; and virtuous; ’tis\u00a0
so, I cannot reprove it; and wise, but for loving\u00a0
me; by my troth, it is no addition to her wit, nor\u00a0
no great argument of her folly, for I will be
horribly in love with her. I may chance have some\u00a0
odd quirks and remnants of wit broken on me,\u00a0
because I have railed so long against marriage: but\u00a0
doth not the appetite alter? a man loves the meat\u00a0
in his youth that he cannot endure in his age.
Shall quips and sentences and these paper bullets of\u00a0
the brain awe a man from the career of his humour?\u00a0
No, the world must be peopled. When I said I would\u00a0
die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I\u00a0
were married. Here comes Beatrice. By this day!
she’s a fair lady: I do spy some marks of love in\u00a0
her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Enter BEATRICE]\n\n\n\n

Beatrice. <\/strong>Against my will I am sent to bid you come in to dinner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>Fair Beatrice, I thank you for your pains.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Beatrice. <\/strong>I took no more pains for those thanks than you take 
pains to thank me: if it had been painful, I would 
not have come.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benedick. <\/strong>You take pleasure then in the message?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Beatrice.\u00a0<\/strong>Yea, just so much as you may take upon a knife’s
point and choke a daw withal. You have no stomach,\u00a0
signior: fare you well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Exit]\n\n\n\n

Benedick.\u00a0<\/strong>Ha! ‘Against my will I am sent to bid you come in\u00a0
to dinner;’ there’s a double meaning in that ‘I took
no more pains for those thanks than you took pains\u00a0
to thank me.’ that’s as much as to say, Any pains\u00a0
that I take for you is as easy as thanks. If I do\u00a0
not take pity of her, I am a villain; if I do not\u00a0
love her, I am a Jew. I will go get her picture.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

[Exit]\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

LEONATO\u2019S orchard. [Enter BENEDICK] Benedick. Boy! [Enter Boy] Boy.\u00a0Signior? Benedick. In my chamber-window lies a book: bring it hither to me in the orchard. Boy. I am here already, sir. Benedick.\u00a0I know that; but I would have thee hence, and here again.\u00a0[Exit Boy]I do much wonder that one man, seeing how much\u00a0another man is a fool when he dedicates […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-24","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/PaXq7d-o","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/24","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/24\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":69,"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/24\/revisions\/69"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.seethingbrains.com\/muchado2019\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}